As I mentioned in my book talk, I am one of two in vitro fertilization babies in my family-- first me, then my brother. And I have always thought so much about this considering it is the way I was conceived. But it is not the mind-blowing fact that science is able to do such a thing that blows my mind; it is the probability that I would even be here. Normally, the first fertilized egg is the winner-- yes, the odds are low that that specific combination would be created, but with in vitro fertilization the first fertilized egg has even more obstacles to make it through. They must first be fertilized (improbable in and of itself). Then they must be chosen out of hundreds in a group of around 18. From there they must be one of the two or three chosen to actually be implanted. And then they must survive, which is very unlikely. In my case, I was one of the two embryos implanted, and the other one did not survive, otherwise we would have been twins. That exact case happened to my cousins, actually, who are five-year-old fraternal twins. So technically my brother and I were conceived at the exact same time, he was just frozen for two years until my parents wanted another child. He could have just as easily been implanted instead of myself, and I would be 14. But, as my observation proves, the odds are low for either of us to be here.
I’m not sure why it is always on my mind, though. Almost every day I think about the odds that I am here. But, in a way, I think it makes me slightly more appreciative of life. On the days I feel unimportant or as if I have no purpose, I remind myself that if I made it through all of the hoops I did as an embryo, I can make it through so much more today and defy the odds of life as I did the odds of science.
I didn't know that about you (haven't watched your book talk yet). So it was really interesting to read your perspective on this. We spent almost 2 years pursuing ART, but never did IVF; because I kept miscarrying, we decided it wasn't worth the cost to do IVF if I'd probably lose it anyhow. But what I think is most interesting is your takeaway about how insane are the odds of any of us existing. When you're a teenager in Health class, they make it sounds like pregnancy is soooo likely (and to be fair, when you're so young, it's definitely more likely), but this experience taught me how many million things need to go right in order to get the already miracle-conception allll the way through to a healthy baby. It's absolutely mind boggling; I have learned so much more about reproduction than I ever would have imagined.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand, IVF is so expensive and a tiring process of blood work, shots everyday-- a complete lifestyle change. My parents lived in New Jersey while they were trying to get pregnant with me, and in that state everyone gets I believe 3 free rounds of IVF, so after my mom's first failure, she had me with her second round and my brother with her third. I've never heart of ART, I will have to look into that!
DeleteThat is very interesting and inspiring, I had no clue that that was how you were conceived. I think that is a great reminder about how lucky we are to be here and to remember how special all life is.
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